ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
