I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
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