i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
