Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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