No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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