It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
