We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
