zippers are such a cool invention
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
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