And the cops told us we were all naked.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
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