The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
