if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Randomize
