Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
