Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize