We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize