Sponge bath it is.
that's an acceptable place to lick
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
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