That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
Randomize