Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
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