i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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