Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
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