Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
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