he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
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