can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize