@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
Randomize
