His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize