Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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