yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
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