When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
