Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
Randomize
