Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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