rhymes with "ouble enetration"
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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