At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
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