I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
