opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Randomize
