I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
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