i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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