Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Randomize
