'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
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