At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Randomize
