I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
I don't think brook has ever known best
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
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