its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
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