he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
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