He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
Randomize
