Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Randomize
