Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
