In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
