But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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