Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
