Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize
