normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
i think im in europe. pls send help
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
