Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
