I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
I have grass duct taped all over my body
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
