You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
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