hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Randomize
